Thanks for the Thanks
You've heard the saying, "20 Jews, 50 opinions?"
That's my family. Except there's 25 of us. And more like 100 opinions. So much like your own, our Thanksgivings tend to be, um, loud affairs.
For about 10 Thanksgivings now, we've been migrating up and down the coast of Florida, trying to find a suitable place to hold dinner. We've been settled in Amelia Island (a half-hour outside of Jacksonville) for a couple holidays now. And it's a beautiful area, complete with salt-marshes and Florida's version of Tidewater Aristocracies. The beach is a lovely strand, dotted with pleasant condos and vacationing families. For some fortunate reason, everyone who visits the beach is respectful to the fact that some things can be enjoyed without loud music and beer cans and garbage in general, so it's a nice place to play in the sand too. Which comes in handy when 20 Southern Jews are asking about your life and telling you about your life...
The point is, it's nice that the whole family can come together in a beautiful place to be thankful.
So it doesn't really bother me that this is the second Thanksgiving that Grandma has chosen to have catered. I mean, she's been doing it for 54 some odd years now. I can see how she'd be over it.
Plus, Turkey Wars get pretty serious in this family.
But after eating the meal (salad, sweet potatoes, mashed potatoes, string beans and carrots for me--no turkey!) I missed that heavy feeling of guilt and glutton.
I think it's because they forgot to put in the "dash of love." Don't get me wrong, the meal was fine and the company was pleasant enough. But there's something about stressing over the individual components of Thanksgiving, wanting to make the stuffing the best possible, because it's for your family. And then, you sit down with a pile of food and stuff your face and compliment the cooks and laugh and drink and have general good times with your loved ones.
I have no complaints though, it was a nice break from work and school.
Of course, there is no easy way to shift over to my next subject. It is by far, one of the most difficult subjects anyone avoids dealing with.
An senior at my Alma Mater who had Chron's Disease and, apparently Bone Marrow Cancer died last night. 18 years old, she was a tiny girl who embodied her mother's overprotectiveness. I met her on the crew team. And I do remember watching her, as a coxswain, win her first race with her boat of four. The look of absolute glee on her face was almost inspiring to me, because it never gets as good as that first victory. And I think it was especially powerful because it was like the first time her mom had ever let her play outside, and she had won!! Her boat threw her in the water as winning rowers are wont to do, and her happiness spread to the rest of the team, a tiny young thing laughing in the mucky water.
I can honestly say I never saw the girl show any negative attitude. She was always open; to suggestions, new ideas, new people. She might have missed a few practices, because she was ill, but she always pulled more than her weight, and believe me, with her 5 foot stature, that was a lot. So I choose to remember her the way I knew her, a happy, giggly, optimistic, kind, loving, friendly teenaged girl.
It will never, ever be easy to understand why some people die "before their time." Who's to say what she could have accomplished? I feel a great sadness for her family and her friends. No one deserved this pain.
This Universe works in mysterious, suprising ways. Who is to say all the great things she might have accomplished? She had many dreams, I'm sure. It's not fair that she didn't get the chance to take a crack at them. It's not fair that she didn't get to experience the stress of applying to college, the anticipation of waiting for that big, fat envelope.
It's not fair that her crush didn't ask her to her senior prom. It's not fair that she won't get to gain her freshman 15. It's not fair that she has to rely on Ramen or cold pizza for sustenance so that she can pay her tuition or rent. It's not fair that she will never have to look for a job. It's not fair that she will never have to get dressed in business atire and sit through an interview for a job she might have ended up hating anyways. It's not fair that she will never get to go through the stress of relationships. It's not fair that she will never be able to say "I love you" to someone other than her family. It's just not fair.
No one said life was fair.
That being said, I can only hope that people take time to appreciate the things in life that make them stronger....
That's my family. Except there's 25 of us. And more like 100 opinions. So much like your own, our Thanksgivings tend to be, um, loud affairs.
For about 10 Thanksgivings now, we've been migrating up and down the coast of Florida, trying to find a suitable place to hold dinner. We've been settled in Amelia Island (a half-hour outside of Jacksonville) for a couple holidays now. And it's a beautiful area, complete with salt-marshes and Florida's version of Tidewater Aristocracies. The beach is a lovely strand, dotted with pleasant condos and vacationing families. For some fortunate reason, everyone who visits the beach is respectful to the fact that some things can be enjoyed without loud music and beer cans and garbage in general, so it's a nice place to play in the sand too. Which comes in handy when 20 Southern Jews are asking about your life and telling you about your life...
The point is, it's nice that the whole family can come together in a beautiful place to be thankful.
So it doesn't really bother me that this is the second Thanksgiving that Grandma has chosen to have catered. I mean, she's been doing it for 54 some odd years now. I can see how she'd be over it.
Plus, Turkey Wars get pretty serious in this family.
But after eating the meal (salad, sweet potatoes, mashed potatoes, string beans and carrots for me--no turkey!) I missed that heavy feeling of guilt and glutton.
I think it's because they forgot to put in the "dash of love." Don't get me wrong, the meal was fine and the company was pleasant enough. But there's something about stressing over the individual components of Thanksgiving, wanting to make the stuffing the best possible, because it's for your family. And then, you sit down with a pile of food and stuff your face and compliment the cooks and laugh and drink and have general good times with your loved ones.
I have no complaints though, it was a nice break from work and school.
Of course, there is no easy way to shift over to my next subject. It is by far, one of the most difficult subjects anyone avoids dealing with.
An senior at my Alma Mater who had Chron's Disease and, apparently Bone Marrow Cancer died last night. 18 years old, she was a tiny girl who embodied her mother's overprotectiveness. I met her on the crew team. And I do remember watching her, as a coxswain, win her first race with her boat of four. The look of absolute glee on her face was almost inspiring to me, because it never gets as good as that first victory. And I think it was especially powerful because it was like the first time her mom had ever let her play outside, and she had won!! Her boat threw her in the water as winning rowers are wont to do, and her happiness spread to the rest of the team, a tiny young thing laughing in the mucky water.
I can honestly say I never saw the girl show any negative attitude. She was always open; to suggestions, new ideas, new people. She might have missed a few practices, because she was ill, but she always pulled more than her weight, and believe me, with her 5 foot stature, that was a lot. So I choose to remember her the way I knew her, a happy, giggly, optimistic, kind, loving, friendly teenaged girl.
It will never, ever be easy to understand why some people die "before their time." Who's to say what she could have accomplished? I feel a great sadness for her family and her friends. No one deserved this pain.
This Universe works in mysterious, suprising ways. Who is to say all the great things she might have accomplished? She had many dreams, I'm sure. It's not fair that she didn't get the chance to take a crack at them. It's not fair that she didn't get to experience the stress of applying to college, the anticipation of waiting for that big, fat envelope.
It's not fair that her crush didn't ask her to her senior prom. It's not fair that she won't get to gain her freshman 15. It's not fair that she has to rely on Ramen or cold pizza for sustenance so that she can pay her tuition or rent. It's not fair that she will never have to look for a job. It's not fair that she will never have to get dressed in business atire and sit through an interview for a job she might have ended up hating anyways. It's not fair that she will never get to go through the stress of relationships. It's not fair that she will never be able to say "I love you" to someone other than her family. It's just not fair.
No one said life was fair.
That being said, I can only hope that people take time to appreciate the things in life that make them stronger....
posted by Weinkle at
11:13 PM
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